…. is not an easy feat.
Most of my friends would avoid like a plague, saying that it’s too difficult to work on it, whereas a few friends would consider it if it is only temporary. Say, a few months.
The hardest thing about being in one is the trust you’d have in your partner, and allowing him or her to have the freedom of being themselves, especially if they enjoy socialising.
And both of you know that you want the relationship to work, therefore the both of you are putting in your efforts in making it work.
One of the most common feature or advice given to maintain this sort of relationship is communication. But we all know it’s easier said than done. If your partner is not into emailing, blogging or writing letters, then it’s down to the pricey options to communicate: text messages and phone calls. Skype and MSN makes it cheaper, but it really depends whether your partner can sit still in front of the computer just for a while!
I know friends who have their partners overseas and because calling Malaysia is reasonably cheap from Australia or the United Kingdom, they make the calls frequently, even up to 3 times a day! I used to think it would be suffocating, but if it works for the couple, who am I to judge.
The saddest thing about this relationship is that sometimes you are not physically there to go through the trials and tribulations of your partner, the ups and downs. But if you tell yourself that it’s for a little while more, and in the future, you will be by his or her side, then patience will pay off.
Of course, there are some who cannot take the lack of physical contact. The need to be constantly hugged and kissed is important for some, that eventually, they’d give up on the long distance relationship and find someone closer to home. It sucks, no doubt about it.
I once had boyfriends who spent a good portion of their salary or monthly allowance to call me overseas and I’d be touched. Except that I eventually had no more feelings for one of them, and the other found a girlfriend closer to home. ;D
It’s hard work, indeed, maintaining a long distance relationship. It’s definitely not for everyone!
If one cannot tough him or herself out for a while for a long distance relationship, what can he or she do when a much bigger obstacle arrives? Look for another relationship again?
sometimes circumstances may change. maybe they eventually find someone whom they’re willing to fight for, or maybe they weren’t ready at that time….. who knows? it’s a tough call. 😉
It is a very painful process. Been there, done that, not going to do it anymore 🙂
i NEVER believe in distance relationship. it is crap. it is bullshit.
It will never work. If someone tells you that his/her distance relationship worked… i can tell you it is because either the guy or the girl sacrificed a lot in terms of agony, uncertainty, dilemma, sleepless nites… the list goes on.
Why wanna suffer in the first place? Without the physical contact, everything can dissolve. The physical contact is the thing that can keep the flame going on.
aiyah, guys need sex, of cos won’t agree to long distance lah!!!! ;P
it’s not really that hard if you see each other regularly, well, every 2-3 months? i think it’s fantastic for those couples who survived long distance relationships, cos they both had the strength to work it through. 😉
well, to some it means freedom. my friend has been in a relationship for 8 years. first 4 years at home. 5th year GF went oversea (1 year study). came back and get married after 3 years. during her absent, he actually enjoy the 1 year of freedom. now got 2 kids already. it might work if u put some effort and not think of sex only. can choose to “curi makan” behind her back. what ur GF doesnt know wont hurt her. 🙂
wtf to the prevous comment. curi makan behind gf’s back? I HATE CHEATERS THE MOST OK. if the bf FEELs the need to curi makan, means he’s no longer committed, then he should break up with her. why keep flogging a dead horse? and trust me, past misdeeds have a way of coming back to haunt the do-er.
i salute those who survived years of ldr. i am inclined to think that if they can survive that WITHOUT CHEATING, they are most likely able to survive any other obstacles their r/ship might face.
no pop pop styling sure die la… diff which i’ve seen is that guys need only hear the voices of his other half to comfort him and yea sex of course… girls need physical asurance that everything’s ok (lets say had a bad day with some dog), and of course again sex..
curi makan doesnt not mean he loves his girl any less, that only means, of course, giving in to temptating but also doing what he has to do to survive. kudos to those who can last so long without ‘curi makaning’. Now that’s greatness.. 🙂
LDRs are absolute waste of time in my experience. Unless u know u wanna get married to him/her I’d suggest find someone closer. What’s the point of a relationship when its conducted through emails?
Do any of you ever went thru a LDR before? I’ve been in one for the past 4 years. I know most of your think its difficult, but when you set your mind to it things works out. Agreed, its takes communication from both side.
bozo: why take the risk of hurting yourself in the first place? Unless you have insurance cover for it…
haiya, it’s not for everyone, that’s for sure. when you’re still a young student, of course it’s a waste of time. but when you’re adults, it could be different.
don’t forget there are cases where people fall in love through the internet and have never met before. and when they finally meet, they make it happen. some end up with their own chapter of happily ever after. 😉