Hari Raya Puasa is around the corner. While the muslim observe the holy month of fasting, we, the non-muslim benefited from the various food on sell in the Ramadan Bazaar. I think i am the among the few who didn’t visit any Ramadan Bazaar this year. So Sad….
As we (Malaysian) all know, our muslim friends are not allowed to eat or drink from dawn to dusk except when you are sick or…when your (for woman) dai yi ma (dai yi ma is your aunty who is mother’s sister, it is also a Cantonese slang for a woman period. Don’t ask me why they call it that.).
The other day, our indian (oh yea, the hindu will be celebrating depavalli (Hindu Festival of Light) soon) runner bought the whole office, KFC for lunch.
Boss: eh, frank. Go call Kak AW (AW is the Senior Lawyer in my firm) down to eat.
me: huh? She don’t need to puasa (Fast in malay) meh? this morning i saw Ms. W (the Malay clerk) didn’t puasa also.
Boss and the other staff: ….
me: Why ar?
Boss and the other staff:…..
I looked at Master.
me: Why ar
Boss: aiya, because they are having their period la.
me: …. *hide behind my KFC Hot and Spicy thigh*

Yoyogi Park

Sunday is the best time to visit Yoyogi Park as it will be filled with all sorts of strange people.

We were greeted with the sight of street buskers and performers. There was a group of guys who were performing some sort of comedy. Then the rest were some inspiring singers. They were selling their own CDs and even had their own fan base. Female singers especially, have many fans. We saw this bunch of middle aged men singing along with a group of female singers.

Comedian with 6 packs. Where to find man?

Amoi yang cantik hey! Saya mau kong.. (translation: Pretty singer)

Lost Gaijin in Tokyo

This group of girls has many fans

But some poor singers had no one. They were performing to thin air.

As we went further, we saw tents and stalls filled with hippies, bohemians and Native American Indians wannabes. They were selling many things and even erected a toupee.

One of the funniest people I saw were a bunch of school kids performing choreography dance steps, swinging their heads and bodies left and right. I mean like, dude!! You’re at the wrong place! The last thing I want to see here in Yoyogi Park is Melbourne Shufflers.

We spend some time resting in the park, playing with a self made bow that I found on the grass. We also took a picture of a girl showing off her huge thong.

Thong thong thongg

We saw many foreigners in that park. Some of them were surrounded by Japanese girls. Bastards.

Next stop, Harajuku Bridge. I was told that Sunday is a great time to visit this place as it will be filled with young cosplay and Gothic Lolita girls. They dress themselves like anime characters or in gothic clothes. And boy, they do love being photographed.

The bugger on the right is damn irritating

Few blocks away is Takeshita Street aka ‘Young people’s street”. It’s a long narrow street filled with shops that caters young people. There you can get gothic clothes or cosplay clothes and also a huge 4 storey Hyaku Yen Shop. (100Yen shop).

Takeshita Street @ Night

Tak Nak Part 2

Time for a smoke? One cigarette reduces your life by 11 minutes

Smoking is SO GOOD even the chinese heavenly Goddess smoke.
Studies investigating the impact on mortality of socioeconomic and lifestyle factors such as smoking tend to report death rates, death rate ratios, odds ratios, or the chances of smokers reaching different ages. These findings may also be converted into differences in life expectancy. We estimated how much life is lost in smoking one cigarette.
Our calculation is for men only and based on the difference in life expectancy between male smokers and non-smokers and an estimate of the total number of cigarettes a regular male smoker might consume in his lifetime. We derived the difference in life expectancy for smokers and non-smokers by using mortality ratios from the study of Doll et al of 34 000 male doctors over 40 years.1 The relative death rates of smokers compared with non-smokers were threefold for men aged 45-64 and twofold for those aged 65-84,1 as corroborated elsewhere.2 Average life expectancy from birth for the whole population or subgroups can be derived from life tables. Applying the rates of Doll et al to the latest interim life tables for men in England and Wales, with adjustment for the proportion of smokers and non-smokers in each five year age group,3 we found a difference in life expectancy between smokers and non-smokers of 6.5 years.
We used the proportion of smokers by age group, the median age of starting smoking, and the average number of cigarettes smoked per week in the 1996 general household survey.4 We calculated that if a man smokes the average number of cigarettes a year (5772) from the median starting age of 17 until his death at the age of 71 he will consume a total of 311 688 cigarettes in his lifetime.
If we then assume that each cigarette makes the same contribution to his death, each cigarette has cost him, on average, 11 minutes of life:
6.5 years=2374 days, 56 976 hours, or 3 418 560 minutes
5772 cigarettes per year for 54 years=311 688 cigarettes
3 418 560/311 688=11 minutes per cigarette.
This calculation is admittedly crudeit relies on averages, assumes that the health effects of smoking are evenly spread throughout a smoker’s lifetime, presupposes that the number of cigarettes smoked throughout a lifetime is constant, and ignores the difficulties in classifying people as either lifetime smokers or non-smokers.5 However, it shows the high cost of smoking in a way that everyone can understand.
The first day of the year is traditionally a time when many smokers try to stop, and on 1 January 2000 a record number might be expected to try to start the new millennium more healthily. The fact that each cigarette they smoke reduces their life by 11 minutes may spur them on. The table shows some better uses for the time they save.
1.This Article was originally published in BritishMedical Journal.
2. The copyright of the photo above does not belong to www.xes.cx. The photo has been obtained from the World Wide Web without any information of it’s owner.

Zero and O Part 2

On the last occassion, i wrote about how dumb some people are in not knowing that Zero is O and O is Zero. However a few days ago, a respectable Court Clerk (at least he is to me) told me that, in Malaysia Zero is Zero…
Few days ago, i went to the Court to do some urgent extraction.
Clerk: Hello, Young man. What do you want?
me: Want to extract sealed judgement of this file. File number is O O 5.
Clerk: what what 5?
me: O O 5
Clerk: Zero Zero 5 lar!!!
me: eeer, ya
Clerk: Comon la, this is Malaysia. We don’t say O O 5. We say Zero Zero 5. OK?
me: ….
Clerk: What is the file number?
me: O…i mean Zero Zero five *cough* bastard *cough*.
ok, i didn’t call him a bastard. Young Lawyers who are rude to the Court Clerk will be made to pay a hefty price…some rumours say that your file will end up in Gombak River (the river next to the court. Is it call Gombak River?)
P.S. To xxess, this is MY story. You may post it on your site provided if you give the Credit to ME and WWW.XES.CX. Thank You.

Copyright Infringement

Please visit..

http://xxess.blogdrive.com/ (EDIT: WEBSITE REMOVED)

NOTE: Not affiliated with www.xes.cx in any ways.

Lets see..
Here are some screenshots of the website (click for bigger image)

Cris’s banner! OMG!

Frank’s post!

Here’s Mr. xes using my about page as template.

JeffOoi’s Screenshot is a Chinese blog? WTF!?

Look @ my link icon!

Dude, why dont you cut out my face from a picture and paste your face on it and then name my friends Abu, Ah Kao, Muthu or something.

No I’m not angry, I’m just amused.


Frank’s very angry..very, very angry.. you wont like it when Frank’s angry..


Follow up @ http://xes.cx/?p=971

Malaysian school for Malaysian?

This morning, while i was about start on my work, i heard a loud scream from my colleague’s room…

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU CAN’T ACCEPT MY NEPHEW! My newphew is a Malaysian with Malaysian birth cert! Malaysian Passport and Malaysian IC!!!”

Then, she closed her door. 10 mins later, she came out and step into the library where we had our ummmm…after court gossiping, eer…i mean discussion.

Colleague:”Bloody hell!!! This is so unfair! My nephew is born in Malaysia but raised oversea. He returned to Malaysia 2 years ago. He try to apply to a government secondary school but all the schools in KL rejected his application because they says that his father is a foreigner. Stupid la!!! My newphew has Malaysia birth Certificate, Malaysia Passport and a Malaysia IC that says “WARGANEGARA” (citizen)!I am going to call Putrajaya (Administrative Capital of Malaysia) now!”

She went out to make a few more phone calls. When we came back from lunch, she told us that she got the confirmation from Putrajaya that although her nephew’s father is a foreigner, he still has a right to receive education in a government school. However, still none of the schools in KL is willing to accept her nephew until they have a meeting among all the Secondary School Headmasters on this issue!!!

If i am her, i will publicise this matter in all the major newspapers in Malaysia. then I will tell the Headmasters not to waste their time and the people’s money on this utterly stupid meeting which is to decide a clear cut matter because i will see the Education Ministery in Court.
Oh, forget about complaining to the MPs. They will probably tell you to write letters to the relevent department. They will tell you if you do not get a positive respond on your first letter, write another one. Keep writing till you get a positive respond. If you ask them whether you have other option? Yes, the other option is that they will write the letter for you…or wait till the election is around the corner. They will do anything for you, then.

So you wanna throw away your computer…

This is what you can do with your old computer…

1. Punch a hole on your memory and CPU to make a key chain

2. eeer…use your CD-Rom as make up mirror.

3. Use your casing as BBQ Pit.

4. Use your mouse to walk your dog. Not recommended to people with big dogs.

5. Your monitor as hamster cage?

6. LCD screen as poker table!!!


Malaysia – a copy cat nation

When I was young, I always fret that our national flag is almost identical with the flag of United States.

Malaysia flag

Why cant they come out with something original?

USA flag

Then we have our “Buatan Malaysia” logo.

Looks similiar eh?

Few months ago, Malaysia’s national newspaper, The Star reported that the Malaysia national anthem, Negara ku is a song from a Hawaiian melody.

The song is called Mamula Moon and is by Felix Mendelssohn and His Hawaiian Serenaders.

Download here (by Teh Eng Hock of The Star)


Compare with
Negara ku – Malaysia national anthem
The Star newspaper report: http://cmorbutt.multiply.com/journal/item/32
Reminds me of my primary school days when we alter our national anthem to….

Negara kuu (My Country)
Tunku chui fuu (Tunku (first prime minister) takes off his pants)