Author: bimbobum

(a page from bimbobum’s diary)
I know a lot of people who are still good friends with their ex-es, and even with their ex-es’ families. Sometimes I’m impressed with that fact, sometimes I think it’s not a safe thing to do. But people say it depends whether or not there was an amicable break up in the first place.
Some people tell me that I obviously am not over the ex-es when my reaction reveals my inner feelings. Should their names be mentioned, should I receive any form of communication from them, I’d stiffen and cringe, and my defences immediately shoot up and strengthen 20 times.
Remember the ex I saw at KLCC? Well, when we first met up together with his friends 4 months after we broke up, I thought I was ready to be friends. But I was wrong. It was so awkward, I felt awkward. I didn’t dare to make eye contact, I was just not prepared to act like normal friends with him. He made a comment, which I knew was in good faith, but I was defensive and I didn’t like it one bit. He told me that my bra was showing through my shirt buttons. How not to react to that?? ;P
But if you ask me now whether I’d be able to talk to him casually now, I think I’d be able to. ;P I’ve never had the chance so far, so I can’t guarantee it. No, the KLCC one does not count, pimple on forehead and no make up remember?? Cannot! I must be dressed good and looking attractive like hell, then only I’m ready to charm him all over again la. Heh, I doubt I’d be able to charm him all over. I’d just try my luck. ;P
Remember the other ex I had lunch with a few months back? I still don’t like him very much. I seriously hate it when he contacts me for some reason, I don’t like making small talk with him, I hate his looks. I hate how smug he looks, I can just imagine him smirking over something I say even if we’re chatting on MSN. Eeyuck.
To me, I think he tries too hard to absolve himself from the guilt he had from breaking up with me years ago, by being a ‘good friend’ now. Which I do not need.
Yup, now he just sounds so superior and all when he chats or calls or sms. beh-tahan. (cannot stand it.)
I’m not the only person who can’t stand being in touch with (some of) their ex-es, I hope.

Internet + Etiquette = Netiquette
Even on the internet, all users are advised to have their basic manners and courtesy in check. Simple stuff like thinking before you post, making sure you’re not typing everything out in CAPITAL LETTERS, be pleasant and do not aim to be sarcastic (bordering insults), etc.
The 2 types of internet species most notorious in creating hell (internet gangsters!) are:

Flaming
– Flamers are the ones who post deliberate insulting and hostile messages on social/community discussion forums
– One of the causes of flaming is egocentrism – we assume we know a writer’s tone, which may lead to misinterpration of the writer’s intended meaning.
– The Flame Master: “there’s always a couple of people at the centre of the war; one of these may be a Flame Master. Usually self-selected as the owner of the ‘moral high ground’, the Flame Master has survived previous campaigns and even enjoys it. The Flame Master leads the attacks and carries the thread forward.”
– Flaming is a deliberate act, not an accident.
– Examples of how to start a Flame War: 1. Accuse your opponent of being overly sensitive, or suggest in a patronizing tone that they “must be having a bad day”, or 2. Claim that *everything* is a matter of opinion, that there are no such things as facts or truth, or 3. Change the subject by pointing out all of your opponent’s grammar and spelling mistakes. (hehe, i was laughing at this. ;P)

Trolling
– Someone who comes into an established community forum and posts inflammatory, rude, repetitive or offensive messages designed intentionally to annoy and antagonize the existing members or disrupt the peace of the forum.
– Trolls are disruptive or usually attention-seeking, posting messages with intentional typos, or hateful comments to incite ‘war’, or opinionated messages without any proof or analysis to back up the messages.
– They don’t “get” that they are hurting real people. To them, other Internet users are not quite human but are a kind of digital abstraction. As a result, they feel no sorrow whatsoever for the pain they inflict. Indeed, the greater the suffering they cause, the greater their ‘achievement’ (as they see it).
– Trolls crave attention, and they care not whether it is positive or negative. They see the Internet as a mirror into which they can gaze in narcissistic rapture.
– Can be classified as having a Personality Disorder. ;P So you psychos out there, beware! Time to think carefully why you don’t have many good friends…. ;P
Etc
– It has been said that hiding behind a false name, created for flaming, or no name, is cowardly.
– Don’t badger other users for personal information such as sex, age, or location. After you have built an acquaintance with another user, these questions may be more appropriate, but many people hesitate to give this information to people with whom they are not familiar.
– How to deal with Trolls? IGNORE the idiots.
Purpose of this post? Don’t be a flamer or a troll!
Question: is posting the comment “lame” repeatedly on all the person’s post considered trolling?
If you have nothing nice to say, might as well shaddup, ya? ;P unless the person deserves it la.
Links:
Netiquette on wikipedia
Netiquette Guidelines
Flame Warriors – picture profile and personality description provided (hilarious!)
How to Participate In a Internet Flame War – for humour

related post: threatening suicide is dumb.
the ex-boyfriend’s side of the story
My ex-girlfriend (Clingy) drives me crazy. When we were going out, she used to come over almost everyday and i felt suffocated. I couldn’t go out with my friends without her (even if it was a male-bonding session over mamak) and sometimes she’d be calling me so many times on my mobile phone, just to find out if we could meet up after i went out with my friends. hello?? If i finish meeting up at my friends at 2am, it was still a must to either give her a call or meet up with her, and she stays pretty far from my place.
How could i not feel that she was controlling and clingy?
One of the things i really hated her for forcing me do it, was to burn the things which were left behind by an earlier ex. i didn’t burn it, but i’ve hidden it somewhere just in case she would want her things back.
The truth is, i think i’m not over the earlier ex, who made such a difference in my life. even my family noticed the changes in me, and i believe that they thought she was The One. well, i thought she was The One, too.
During my time with Clingy, i tried to win myself back into The One‘s good books. i kept in touch with her, i showed her my concern as much as possible, but it was difficult when Clingy was watching me all the time. i promised The One so many things, there was a lot i was willing to do for her.
But after a while, The One stopped contacting me. I was worried. I wanted to find out if she was going out with someone new, but she refused to tell me. How could she be over me already?? Nevertheless, I informed her through sms that she’d always be the one in my heart and I’d have her in my thoughts most of the time.
It bugged me a lot and my mood affected my relationship with Clingy. she became more paranoid and demanded more attention from me.
One thing i know is that Clingy is definitely not ‘The One’. she’s a nice girl, but it stops there. we don’t share many interests together. She’s high maintenance.
I finally broke up with her because i couldn’t take the burden of having to show my concern for her almost 24 hours a day. phone calls and sms during the working hours and dinner and spending time after dinner together almost everyday, even with my family was just demanding too much of me!
But a week later, we got back together. Because she threatened suicide and I got scared. I think she’s sick in the head, too, when there were times she jokingly said that maybe she should get pregnant so we could get married. she’s nuts!
Whatever it is, i think she’s one hell of an insecure girl. I kind of regret getting together with her in the first place. She’s still her controlling and clingy self. Help.
Note: Don’t feel sorry for him. I think he’s an a-hole for trying to be a knight in shining armour to The One, yet playing Clingy for a fool. He even suggested to The One that if she needed attention (intimately) he would be willing to come over should she call. sick! bloody sex maniac….

My friend’s car was hit by a college student the other day, denting his boot and bumper. The college student offered to pay for the damage (his car was damaged as well) because he didn’t want it reported. So off they went to some ridiculous place in subang, damn far in….. you know, right after subang airport? that area la. forever traffic jam, too.
I had to drive him there to pick up his car, but it wasn’t ready yet. He was pretty worried about the payment. What if the student ran off and did not pay for his? What happens? What if the mechanic claims to have no knowledge of the arrangement?
My friend had a note signed by the college student, stating that he was to pay for the damages to my friend’s car, absolving my friend from liability of payment due to the mechanic. The mechanic signed the note as a witness.
But what if the student really ran off after collecting his car, and the mechanic refuse to release my friend’s car to him, without payment?
I was hoping that it wouldn’t happen when we arrived at the workshop, because it would really complicate things. Thankfully, the student’s car was still not done, and my friend manage to take his car without any fuss. The mechanic took a copy of the note, probably to show it to student and demand payment for both car repairs. ;P
Let’s say the student ran off without paying for my friend’s car repairs, obviously the mechanic wouldn’t release my friend’s car, right? He would want to hold it as a security for the ‘debt’ owing. But my friend would argue that he knew of the arrangement (based on the note) so it’d be his fault for releasing the student’s car first. But if both remained stubborn, who would actually be in the right?
If it were me, obviously i would blame the mechanic! ;P
Anyway, we had dinner at one of the seafood restaurants within walking distance. Suddenly we felt like eating crabs, but bloody hell, i didn’t know it was that expensive! 2 sri lankan crabs and 1 vege dish = RM116.00 and i almost fainted.
But the cheesy garlic crab dish was nice. ;P
Had to bring the leftovers home because we couldn’t finish it.

all mine!

Yikes.
I’ve never liked this question, when it comes from a potential candidate. I’d start counting in my head, “hmm… there’s Mike, and then there’s Patrick, …..” before answering with a solid number. I’d secretly pray he didn’t pass out (assuming he had lesser ex-es) or smirk (assuming he had more) at my answer.
How do you actually label that person an ex? By the length of the relationship, or the seriousness of it?
“Yeah, she’s my 8th ex-girlfriend. we decided to be a couple, but after 2 days, we realised that we were just better off being friends.” An ex once declared to me.
“2 days is considered a relationship? And she’s an ex-girlfriend? Please! That 2 days does not count. If not, I’d have more than the number I gave you!!”I retorted as I rolled my eyes.
Seriously, 2 days “together as a couple” qualifies as an ex? My goodness, imagine including all the 1 night stands to your history of ex-es! (Anyway, he still insisted she was an ex. omg.)
Perhaps some are proud with their history – to show off to their friends, whereas some are embarrassed. Consider them conquests?
I’ve lost track of my number. ;P
Just kidding. The problem is, I don’t know if I should include the 1-week-old relationship as well.
Does it really matter how her/his history is?
Or is it an indirect way of finding out how many people she/he has slept with? ;P
However, the number of ex-es may not necessarily equal the amount of people slept with!