staying away

a few months ago (some time last year), i reluctantly agreed to have dinner with an ex-boyfriend. he said he needed a favour from me.
although reluctant, i felt i had no choice – so that he didn’t have to bother me again for future favours. ;P
imagine me flinging my hands, a nervous wreck, confiding in my friends, “oh no, do i have to dress to kill?? just to show him that i’m SO over him??”
that’s definitely something a girl ALWAYS has to do, i’m afraid, be it an ex or a potential – must dress to kill.
so we met up. i tried not to be nervous. i also tried not to laugh. because he looked different. kind of dorky. ;P
dinner went surprisingly well. except when i asked about his current relationship. and he started to confide in me about their problems. eeks. i should have kept my mouth shut.
this is not right. i had thought to myself. i made the appropriate mmhmms and aaahs to show i understood what he said at that time.
he told me that they’ve been going out for a year now, and the funny thing was, his girlfriend kept breaking up with him, because she felt she wasn’t ready for a steady relationship. but a few weeks later or so, she’d ask to get back together, and he’d agree. for the entire year, they have broken up about 8 times!
i asked if he was the one who initiated each break up. i couldn’t help it. because when we were going out, he kept asking for a temporary split so frequent. but anyway, he insisted that she was the one. and it frustrated him because he really wanted them to make things work.
why i asked the question was this. just 3 months ago, i received a friendster message from his girlfriend, who wanted to be friends. i was naturally surprised, because i didn’t know he was going out with anyone (but not to say i cared). why would his girlfriend want to befriend me? spooky, my friends told me. they told me to stay away.
i couldn’t help but to like her, after overcoming my fear that i was being stalked. ;P against my better judgment, we exchanged email addresses and started emailing each other frequently, and i told myself that i’d keep it platonic, i wouldn’t ask anything about their relationship at all. just talk about girly stuff. yeah!
yet out of the blue, just 2 months ago, she confessed that their relationship has been having some difficulties, and he was always asking to break up. and a few weeks later, they’d get back together, and it confused the hell out of her. i felt for her, because …. well, i’m always feeling sad for girls who have relationship problems (because i think they deserve to be happy).
therefore, when the ex mentioned otherwise, chills ran down my spine. gulp. shit, i started to panic, who the hell was telling me the truth??
but till this day, i don’t know and i don’t even want to know (ok, maybe JUST a bit ;P). i’ve stopped emailing his girlfriend and i pray he or she doesn’t get back in touch with me, because i don’t want to get caught in the middle – imagine if one day the ex comes screaming into my face, telling me that i’ve been meddling and goodness knows what nonsense i’ve been telling his girlfriend or causing so much havoc or something like that? imagine if the girlfriend twists everything around and says that i’m the one who has been stalking her and demanding to be friends? eeks.
you just never know.

18 thoughts on “staying away”

  1. i agree with pikey. as much as possible, be non-committal. looks like someone is hiding something.
    i’m inclined to think its your ex though, because he did call you out again, and it sounds like he’s checking out your response to his “i’m having problems with my current gf” confession… maybe he’s looking to see if you’re still interested.

  2. wow..for someone who has to hide behind paper bags…u sure have very interesting relationship issues every now and then… šŸ˜›

  3. creepy…always stay out. When there’re having a good time then wont thought of u, but when there’re having problem they will even remember how many centimetres ur nose is.

  4. I would say it is best to stay out of all these. Esp when one is your ex.
    I stepped into my best friend’s relationship once, trying to help them to sort things out. Now, I am not talking to either one of them.

  5. u did the right thing bimbobum…stay away.
    u really will never know.
    sometimes i know being nice is good, but aiya, depends lor horr..
    U are so right girl…for not mailing her anymore.
    i shall pray for that ex not contacting u again..

  6. pikey: wanna be friends also difficult. ;P
    whyrl: my ex? aiya, he din really bother after i answered in the negative when he asked if i was seeing anyone. ;P
    mongo: hehe. special appearances no need paperbag! ;P but i had to dress to kill what. paperbag would’ve ruined my outfit. ;P
    obeliskdee: oh yes. it’s easier to find someone to blame!
    zhong: that sucks!!!
    peggy: thanks. =) i hope his gf also doesn’t contact me either. wanna be friendly and helpful also difficult, but if both of them tell me 2 different stories, i don’t think the friendship will work la.

  7. haiya…i type half way forgot to continue…
    Yesterday i said…
    It’s obvious ur ex like this “AIYA BREAK LAH” attitude. Seems like he’s doing it again with that girl. He probably doesn’t realise it but he must be doing it real often. I mean….if he does it..he does it….old habits die hard…
    remember..u have experienced it FIRST HAND!

  8. karheng: yesterday write halfway? where?? heheh.
    can suspect him also la. cos with me, few times also he asked for temporary split. but then again, …… dowan to analyse too much. stay far far away better. of course for the current gf the best person to ask about things is always the ex. but if end up making too much comparison, no point, make herself unhappy only. =)

  9. Bimbobum: I enjoy your posts and i’m glad Xes made you (tricked you) into being a guest blogger. šŸ˜›
    Since you joined, I never have to watch WahlaiToi or Vaanavil ever again. LOL! (not that i watch Wah Lai Toi or Vaanavil in the 1st place la…but metaphorically)

  10. wolfx: which means you don’t read my posts? ehehehe. just kidding~ my life damn drama kua… sorry la i am not as funny or sexy as frank or xes. ;P
    karheng: i was hoping maybe you tell me a story of guys tracking down ex-boyfriends and become buddy-buddy with them to dig out girlfriend’s secrets. ;P

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