The Matchmaker’s Duty

Sometimes, there are friends who’d love to play the role of a matchmaker, just to see that their single friends are happy. Some friends and I have often been ‘victims’ to such schemes, and not always do they result positively.
For example, if you arrange an outing for both ‘candidates’ to meet, would you tell them beforehand so that both are aware of what to expect, or you won’t tell them the objective of the outing at all, until you see both of them getting along fine and dandy?
Several times, I’ve had friends who tell me beforehand: “Hey, let’s meet up this weekend. I want to introduce you to a friend. He’s single!!!”
If you were me, you’d make sure you put your best foot forward so that you’d make a good first impression, and of course, be yourself. It doesn’t mean you’d dress up sloppily, of course. The sense of humour intact, the cheeky grin and laughing eyes – have to be in place.
If you were the guy, what would you do? Make sure you’re not sloppily dressed as well, and you’re not late. Oh, and do pick up the tab for the meal – if you know the purpose of the outing. Don’t worry, it’s to your discretion. If it’s too expensive, then you’re entitled to go dutch. ;D
Sometimes telling both ‘candidates’ beforehand makes it all awkward, because not everyone’s acting skills are fantastic. Conversation is lop-sided, either one of the ‘candidates’ will speak to the mutual friend, not knowing how to speak to the other person.
For me, I’d expect both parties to make an effort to ensure that the other person is part of the conversation and not left out. But I tend to hesitate, when I realise that the guy is not speaking to me, but waits for the mutual friend to have a general topic of conversation so both parties could contribute.
I end up not talking to him, for fear of what he’d think of me: Shit. Does he think I’m a desperado for talking to him? What if he thinks I’m hitting on him so badly that I do look like a desperado with broccoli between my teeth? F*ck.
So I’d end up chatting to the mutual friend instead.
Complicated, isn’t it?
I’ve been matchmade so many times and so many times I have to say I’m rather disappointed with the matchmaker and the candidate – both for having weak acting skills! An awkward situation is very difficult, I tell you, unless there’s alcohol involved.
Question: would you inform both parties beforehand, or after the outing? ;D

17 thoughts on “The Matchmaker’s Duty”

  1. I think it’s best not to tell your friend that you’re trying to hook him or her up with another person.
    Reasons:
    #1, everybody will be nervous;
    #2, everybody will be on their best behaviour and will not act naturally;
    #3, you should let them get to know each other as friends first, and if they like each other, they’ll take it from there.
    I think almost everybody will appreciate a wider social circle, but not everybody will appreciate you pushing people in their faces saying: “She’s perfect for you! Go marry and have babies!” XD
    Cheers girl!

  2. you can always describe the person to the other first, but when arranging for the meet up some time later on, don’t tell them who they’re going to meet. make sure the activity is something which can allow both of them to chat or even give them a reason to chat.

  3. aiya just bring a big bottle of JD for every matchmaking appointment u have lar so that u wont be dissapointed most of the time.. keke πŸ˜›

  4. insomnia: clubbing that time, the lighting is deceiving. due to a bit of darkness, everyone may look good looking. and then, in brighter light, see true features, then …… nobody interested already, a bit cham lor. better let them have a better look of each other mah.

  5. Thrillseeker: give me the JD lah!
    ryuu: come come, we all drink together. bottoms up! i haven’t bottoms up in a long time …… ;D
    insomnia: ahahaah. true also. but fluorescent light is very unflattering. yellow light is best πŸ˜‰
    lingghezhi: heh. maybe a bigger group outing then? less suspicious πŸ˜‰

  6. hiahhhh..haihhhhhh…..haihhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
    i miss malaysia chicks….

  7. haih…i duno how this matchmaking works…….too complicated…no need to say i want to intro u all…want to intro, just intro la…haihhh….~”””

  8. My frens usually wont tell you about the matchmaking thing. Just tell that there will be a group of their frens be joining for an outing and you’re on yourself. Kautim or not, its your skill. But sometime, they will tease you and this girl etc…. that made the situation kinda awkward for both. maahai ah.

  9. endroo G: i think that’s the best option. without the teasing!
    karheng: it’s not like 8 years old that time, tease each other means can start paktoh already lah .ehehe
    lx: aiks? i thought you were going to say m’sian chicks all c*nts? ;P

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