life schmlife~ [part I]

this is gonna be really long..

i drove up & parked my car after spending a few hours @ the gym [yes i actually take part in other activites aside from sleeping!]. it was almost 8pm. dark. street lit by very very dim lights save for a couple of porch lights from my neighbours. suddenly, this figure walks up to my car & starts waving frantically at my left window like, “i’m so excited to see you! omgomg!” o.O

how scary is it when you’re nothing but a silhouette?

i squint & squint to take a better look at him [i conveniently forgot my glasses o.O] & was my neighbour. ironically, one whom i haven’t seen for a long time despite the fact that he lived just a block away. i think i last bumped into him a year ago. it’s funny how you almost forget your surroundings sometimes.
so i got out, opened the boot to lug my bagshoesbooksthingamajigs out, proceeded to dumping them all on the roof of my car, then turned around to say hi.

we launched into a close-to-an-hour conversation.

see, when we were younger, along with some other neighbourhood kids, we’d meet up every evening to walk, talk, cycle, rollerblade, whatever it was that tickled our fancy then. shamelessly, we’d also run around plucking flowers & playing masak-masak.
*insert sepia-toned nostalgic playback here*

anyhooooooo, the conversation came to a point where we were discussing age..& what it does to us. i don’t even remember how we got there but somehow we did! so here..

* as jaded as we might get, remember that it’s not illegal. it’s okay to be jaded. it’s okay that people get depressed. it’s part of what your journey brings. BUT..almost none of one’s mistakes are bad. mistakes don’t always have to be bad. we know enough to call it a mistake, no? we learn from it, no? so it brings us down, so it gives us emotional instability. every time we face a big stink, we find it bloody hard to look beyond the upcoming days, to realize, “i SO can get past this!”. but look deeper into it & you’ll find good in all that turmoil that life inevitably puts you through. & believe me, in the end, you WILL get past it.

* no matter what happens, never forget what you’re worth. never let someone else put you down for what you are. you’re always worth much more than you think. truth be told, no one, & i mean no one, ever has the right to tell you that you’re not worthy. no one has the right to blame you for their own doing. no one should ever take advantage of your existence & think that you were born for his/her abusive purposes. who’s to say how you should be weighed or measured? remember, if you refuse to believe in yourself, no one else is gonna step up to do that for you. that’s one thing for sure. so do yourself a favour & start treating yourself with a little bit more respect. because you’re worth every ounce of it :o)

* my neighbour, let’s call him KC, he says that both women & men alike tend to forget that life is really too damn short for you to live worrying & trying to please people. why do people lose themselves to the world? why do people lose their identities ever so often depending on the people that they’re with? you love someone so much until you lose yourself. you fight to fit in until you lose yourself. why struggle? in the first place, if you’re not yourself, how do you know if you’re really what people accept you as? so you keep trying, flipping personalities like you’re some kinda mechanical doll until they see something that fits? do you really want that? to spend all your days pretending to be something you’re not? life’s too short. just live lah, okay? :o)

age it what moulds you. experience is what makes you.

i write too long of a post.

leongs is gonna kill me.

i’ll continue this later :o)

p/s: i was too lazy to do a spell/grammar check. deal.

the world needs me!!!

not ME, per se. as in peace, love, joy, harmony, & above all, brains. whilst i was driving to ikea/ikano today, i’ve managed to land myself moronic acquaintances on the road. it’s true what they say – some malaysians are truly idiotic when it comes to road rules/safety driving. so PLEASE, okay?

* hello ferarri-red x-trail. i know you’re big. you’ve got the size, you’ve got the height, you’ve got the wheels,’ve even got the ego. but MUST YOU take up BOTH lanes on the highway whilst travelling @ less than 40km/h to get where you’re going? HELLOOOOOOOOOOO?!

* how do you do, neon yellow proton satria? your colour stands out, so does your very badly tinted windows, plus your watermelon-sized exhaust, & the low hoarse hmm-maybe-my-car-is-broken rumbling from your lil baby of a car. you don’t HAVE to tail my lil silver baby’s ass in such manner…ESPECIALLY WHEN I’M ALREADY DRIVING ON THE SLOW LANE! …moron *makes a face*

* oh sorry, i didn’t see you, big-truck-that-refuses-to-stop-swerving-in-&-out-of-lanes. you’re on a job, you’re transporting goods. some probably fragile & undoubtedly breakable. others probably highly expensive. so SAVE your ass [or the goods’] first before you decide you want to dance a lil heavyweight ballet on the roads of m’sia. danks ar. urgh o.O

venting done :o) just my two cents ;o)


mesmerized by mt :D

yay mt rocks.


i haven’t gotten used to it yet. let’s see what the lainey can do here.




underlineeeeeee~! fun!
almost orgasmic :oP

so here i am just about to bitch about some things. keep in mind that it is all directed to nobody in particular. just some random thoughts 😀

#1: i get really irritated whenever i ask a question, wanting to clarify something important & get STUPID replies. here’s a scenario:-

me: so tonight we meet at 9pm? that means i’ll come pick you up at about 8:30pm, right?

if i was really stupid, i wouldn’t be asking you only to get that sorta reply, okay? so just quit the whole bloody american ‘duh‘ thing because it pisses me off :oP

#2: here’s another scenario of ‘stupid replies’:-

me: you know what? i just found out that [let’s say for example] the world is SQUARE! *excited*
person: NOW only you know?!!?

yes, now only i know. it’s RUDE to exclaim in such manner. i think it’s rude anyway. other replies i hate = “so?” “too bad lah!”. or any other haughty replies, for that matter. urgghh…if i needed an autistic answer, i wouldn’t be asking a perfectly normal human being, thanks ar.

#3: as much as i’m a girl & as much as girls tend to do this, i still don’t like it when one says something yet obviously mean another. here’s a scenario:-

me: what’s wrong?
person: nothing.
me: are you sure?
person: yeap. everything’s fine! perfectly fine.
me: why do you sound like that?
person: like what?
me: *groans* like THAT [just SO tempted to POINT here].
person: nothing what. i’m fine!

look, if i know something’s wrong, then it’s obvious that i know you WELL ENOUGH to know. so don’t play lil games by saying ‘nothing‘ when there’s actually ‘something‘. be it serious or not. plus, the negative tone of voice doesn’t help either now, does it?

ignorance isn’t bliss.
sarcasm is the lowest form of wit.

either know how to use it properly or don’t at all o.O

oh no not another ghost story :o(

the lashes is back 😀

leongs is saying i is needing to post this.

*tries to calm breathing*

rapid heartbeats, difficulty breathing [*gasp*], cold sweat, & goosebumps = not due to excitement of blogging. read on & you is knowing why…

the year i was going to turn 21 [finally!], i gained a gift that i certainly did NOT wish for. *counts* in accordance to the chinese calendar, that is. oh memory really IS >that< bad. i can't even remember! anyhoo, let's just say i was turning 21 chinese-year-counting-style. which means i wasn't really turning 21 but ACCORDING to the chinese bla bla whuddeva whuddeva whuddahell, i was gonna turn 21.

are you confused yet? *beams*

since i was a kid, i’ve had several experiences with the supernatural. at first, i thought it was just something that’s always been in-my-head, what with being extremely paranoid & all. turns out, i was really sensitive to the ‘worlds beyond’. it appeared as only ‘feel’ & ‘sound’ at the very beginning. the year i was going to turn 21 [yes, that confusing theory above], things changed…

my late aunt was lying in her death bed. i was completely oblivious to everything because i hardly knew her. she came back from the states to literally ‘die’ @ home. mind you, the last time she saw me was when i was much less than 10 years old. somehow, weird as it sounds, among all my cousins, she remembered me the most o.O

the night before she died, i had myself nicely tucked in bed, ready to visit lala-land. when suddenly, i hear a noise. a baby crying. it was really awfully loud & whuddahell??? none of my neighbours had BABIES. i know they’ve got lil kids but NO BABIES. the baby’s crying-turning-into-creepy-wailing came from…beside my right ear. on my pillow [?!?!!?]. i froze & prayed [i don’t pray, usually] for it to go away. then i fell asleep praying.

come daylight, i went downstairs to use the computer. see, i’ve got one in my room as well but the one downstairs has a printer & all. engrossed i was with eyes glued to the monitor. when suddenly, a really huge a** shadow started flying across my porch. back & forth, over & over. i didn’t come face-to-face with it, of course. but i saw from the corner of my eye. for about 15 whole minutes, it was just zooming around like its brakes weren’t working or something. again, i literally started sweating. i asked my gramma if she could see it but she looked @ me like i was going mad.

gramma: [in hainanese] you crazy ah girl?! it’s broad daylight!
lainey: *shiver* *sweat* *mumbles incoherently*

it caused a ruckus with my sanity. i got up & slowly walked towards my porch, stared outside, & internally DARED it to come out, to face me. it didn’t.

at my aunt’s funeral that night itself, i walked up to one of the nuns that were present. i decided to seek help from someone [or else i would’ve just admitted myself into tanjung rambutan or something]. i told her all about my ordeal. the nun furrowed her brows & looked at me real hard. she asked for my age, my relation with the deceased, cause of death of the deceased, my time of birth, my year of birth, & all other nitty-gritty details like that. then, she sat down & started counting.

the elaine is blur as hell. nunno what’s going on o.O

the nun then got up to explain. she said [in hakka]:-

“young girl, the baby you heard crying was not there to harm you. it is the unborn mourning death. the shadow you saw was not there to provoke you or your family. it is the vision of death. both were present to warn you of your aunt’s departure from life.”

my reaction was..WHAT??!!?!

by the way, my aunt died of cancer. she wasn’t married. she has never had kids.

what cancer, you ask?
cancer of the womb. she had her womb taken out in the earlier stages but they couldn’t save her anyway.
‘unborn mourning death’.

so i guess this is fate, isn’t it?



*runs to her bed & hides under the covers*


hellows *wave wave*…i’m laineylashes *curtsies*.

eraine to some people.
elaine to others.

apparently, miss happening to leongs. i nunno why *confused look*.

i’m here because he allowed me to entertain all you people with my utter nonsense. also because he thinks i’m happening, of course.

but enough about me.

…now let’s talk about me.

no really, i’m gonna talk JUST ABOUT me. ALL ABOUT me! 😀


this is the leongs & the lainey @ the m47 rave.

i PROMISE i’m usually much better looking. really. i mean, i didn’t photoshop that picture or anything, right? so you obviously can’t blame me if i look silly with my tongue hanging lopsidedly out. i swear i look decent usually when i don’t pull a face.

oh yah..i’m also extremely humble.

heck, i’m so nice, everybody loves me *insert lil emoticons with lil loved-up eyes here, or just do that ‘<3 <3 <3!!!' thingmajig*. in fact, that was prolly the reason why the leongs thought me miss happening o.O

okay really now. enough nonsense & shameless self-promoting.

down to real business now.

i know how people look up to the whole shuffling scene. yes, i know it’s not easy to master it. i know how some people look all nice & stylish [or so i’ve heard] doing it. but i think it’s becoming a culture – not a trend. almost like..a..cult *blinks*. now don’t get me wrong. shuffling is unique, indeed :o) everything else that goes with doing the ‘liquid’ & flipping ‘glowstix’, is entirely fine by me. so entertain me with your hidden/new talents, why not? the only thing i don’t understand is why it’s spreading like raging wildfire. or why everyone else is finding themselves having to learn it – be it peer pressure or otherwise.

before i go on, here’s the big big respect to all you master shufflers :o) honestly!

onwards, so, if we decide to monkey around @ raves/clubs like the monkeys that we already are, we’d just end up looking funny/awkward, no? & the fact that you can’t shuffle just puts you off the ‘cool people’ margin? what on earth??? i’m all out for video clips, how-tos, DVDs, & such. although, where does that leave us, really? heck, go to a club today full of shufflers & tell them you CAN’T, for the life of you, shuffle. tell them you’re rhythmically challenged & that you can’t move your feet to save your life. hell, tell them you dance with two left feet. then get back to me on what response you may or may not encounter.

most likely, you’d be ‘outcasted’.

we all bow down to the six winners from hardkandy.
we all kiss & worship their lil shuffling shoes/boots.

their response?

“what we liked most was all the attention we got.”

but of course, sweethearts.

though, nothing really about us. nothing about malaysia. nothing about the music. nothing nothing nothing. zzzzzilch.

think about it :o) & take it with a pinch of salt while you’re at it.

danks :o)