Author: bimbobum

Warning: a forwarded joke via email.
Two priests decided to go to Hawaii on vacation.
They were determined to make this a real vacation by not wearing anything that would identify them as clergy.
As soon as the plane landed they headed for a store and bought some really outrageous shorts, shirts, sandals, sunglasses, etc. The next morning they went to the beach dressed in their “tourist” garb.

They were sitting on beach chairs, enjoying a drink, the sunshine and the scenery when a drop dead gorgeous blonde in a topless bikini came walking straight towards them. They couldn’t help but stare.
As the blonde passed them she smiled and said “Good Morning, Father ~ Good Morning, Father,” nodding and addressing each of them individually, then she passed on by.
They were both stunned.
How in the world did she know they were priests?
So the next day, they went back to the store and bought even more outrageous outfits. These were so loud you could hear them before you even saw them!
Once again, in their new attire, they settled down in their chairs to enjoy the sunshine.

After a little while, the same gorgeous blonde, wearing a different colored topless bikini, taking her sweet time, came walking toward them.
Again she nodded at each of them, said “Good morning, Father ~ Good morning, Father,” and started to walk away.
One of the priests couldn’t stand it any longer and said, “Just a minute, young lady.”
“Yes, Father?”
“We are priests and proud of it, but I have to know, how in the world do you know we are priests, dressed as we are?”

Continue reading Friday Humour: The Two Priests

This picture has been going around via email under the heading of, “Never Make a Woman Unhappy!” or something like that. I received this yesterday via email, although I’ve already seen it on the blog, That Girl Emily.
It’s a blog supposedly started by Emily who found out that her husband cheated on her with her best friend. Furious and pissed off, she plotted her 14 days of vengeance by wrecking havoc one day at a time. The billboard was put up to humiliate her husband, Steve.

Continue reading That Girl Emily

I’M GOING TO BE BALD! BOTAK!
I am losing so much hair whenever I wash my hair, and when I wake up, I see hair on my pillow and my floor beside my bed.
o_O
ACK!!!
They say it’s normal for about 30-40 (pieces? =D what’s the penjodoh bilangan for hair, anyone?) hair to drop daily. Perfectly healthy!
But pulling out dropped strands of hair while washing my hair is a scary thing.
HELP!!!
Is it the diet? Is it the shampoo?
I hear that eating lots of spinach and protein will help make your hair stronger. But it doesn’t talk about preventing excessive hair dropping!
Any advice for a balding girl?

When the world was new, and all the Animals were just beginning to work for Man, there was a Camel that lived in the middle of a Desert.
All the Camel did was eat and eat and when anyone spoke to him he just said, “HUMPH!”
One day, the Horse came to him asking for help, “HEY YOU! Come and help us with the work!”
The Camel only said, “HUMPH!”
Later, the Dog came with a stick in his mouth, “HEY CAMEL! Come and help us by carrying some stuff.”
Bloody lazy Camel just went, “HUMPH!” and the Dog went off to complain to Man.
Then, the Ox came and asked the Camel for help. Again the Camel just went, “HUMPH!” and continued eating.
The Dog, Horse and Ox were damn pissed off as then Man told them to work double time since the useless HUMPH thing refused to help.
So the 3 animals complained to the Djinn of the Desert, how it was bloody unfair for everyone else to be working except for the lazy good-for-nothing HUMPH Camel.
The Djinn was also annoyed, “What?! Later I HUMPH him, then he know!”

Continue reading How the Camel Got His Hump

Saw something from my childhood the other day.
Can you guess?????

Continue reading Something From My Childhood

I’m sure they do.
I used to wonder why some girls I know got hitched with the new boyfriends the minute they jump out of a long-term relationship. I used to ponder so hard, “Why so soon? How do they know that the person is the one?”
We’re talking about a new relationship that is less than a year!
A long-term relationship of 4-7 years is no joke, and to get out of one due to irreconcilable differences is a harsh eye-opener that he or she cannot be the one you will be walking down the aisle with.
But what makes the next person the One you want to walk down the aisle with? Is it because he or she is ready to settle down and start a family with you? Or honestly speaking, you want to get out of singlehood permanently?
Age is always a factor. The old generation’s thinking that women should not be pregnant once they’re above 30 is slowly dying.
Well, unless, your great grandmother is still waiting for you to get that bun in the oven.
Do men worry about being a bachelor for life, once when they hit 35? Do they become desperate to get married, for fear that they’ll always be alone? Surely they do! I mean, that’s what make them propose to their new girlfriend within a year of courtship/relationship, right? ;D
Gee, I’m talking crap on a rainy Sunday evening.

Got this via email.
Advantage 1: Secured lifestyle
An engineer boyfriend can provide you with a secure lifestyle. At 27 years old, an engineer probably has a respectable, stable job that gives him a high income to own a car, invest, have a comfortable life, and get married and buy a house too.
Law graduates are still working as a lowly apprentice in law firm, most management graduates have just failed on their first business plan, the arts graduate is still looking for a job, and the medical school graduate is still living in a hospital.
Advantage 2: Unmatchable industriousness
An engineer boyfriend will dedicate an unimaginable amount of his time and effort to understand you. Engineers strain really really hard to understand their work. You can believe that they will try really really hard to understand women too, just like how they understand their work, once they believe that you are the one. So even if they don’t understand you initially, they will keep on trying. Even if they still do not understand, they will figure out the correct method to keep you happy ( e.g. buy diamond ring = 1 week’s worth of happiness.) And once they find out the secret formula, they will just keep on repeating it so that the desired results appear.
Unlike the Lawyer who will argue with you, the Management graduate who will try to control your spending, the Arts graduate who will ‘change major’, and the medical school graduate who will operate on you. And you know what, it’s really so easy to make engineers believe that you are the ‘one’. Say that you like one of their projects and they will be hooked to you forever.
Advantage 3:
An engineer boyfriend will never betray your trust. Let me first tell you what is wrong with the rest of the others –
the lawyers will lie about everything, management graduates will cheat your money, the arts graduate will flirt, and you probably just look like another cadaver to the medical school graduate.
Your engineer boyfriend is either too busy to have an affair, and even if he does, he is too dumb to lie to you about that.
Hence, an engineer is the most secure boyfriend that you will ever find – rich enough, will keep on trying to
understand and please you, has no time for affairs, and too dumb to lie to you. So girls, why procrastinate?
Get an engineer for your boyfriend!
OK, WHICH ENGINEER WROTE THIS TESTIMONIAL??

First and foremost, welcome to the brand new www.xes.cx 😛 bimbobum is still here to give you the latest happening on my love life 😀
When I have nothing better to do, I wonder back to who was at fault.
A guy I once knew went around telling his friends that I rejected him so brutally that he cried a million rivers that the cows really couldn’t come home.
I went, “WTF?? REJECTED HIM? WHEN?”
His version of the story:
He had a crush on me. I had a crush on him. He bought me gifts. He spent a lot of time with me daily. I stopped responding to his affection. Played with his feelings by going out with other guys. Refused his daily attention. Occasionally came back to milk his attention when I was bored. Played hard to get. He got heart broken. I was a b*tch. The end.
My version of the story:
He developed a crush on me. I flirted just a little bit. He bought me a small gift, not even a cute one. I didn’t like it, but I pretended to and said “Thank you” anyway. We chatted on gtalk occasionally. He got obsessed. Started sending me text messages. I was polite and replied a few. After a while, it got tedious. I kept wondering if he really liked me, he would have picked up the damn phone and called me to ask me out. Instead, daily barrage of text messages. Now where was that supposed to lead to? Did he expect me to call him and ask him out? No thank you. He’s the guy, he should do it. He sulked occasionally when I didn’t respond to his text messages. Now why am I supposed to report to him daily about what I had for breakfast, lunch and dinner? Geez. I got tired of waiting. He got boring. He never called me ever. No point of he having my number and not asking me out if he isn’t interested.
Is that rejection? He didn’t even make a positive move!

The hunt for:
1. the perfect diamond engagement ring drains your money and energy.
2. the perfect time and place to propose.
3. the perfect place for the wedding reception.
3. the neverending guest list your father, mother, aunts, uncles and grandparents insist that you must include some long-lost cousins from mainland China you’ve never met before.
4. the perfect wedding gown and suit that doesn’t make you look fat.
5. the perfect photographer for wedding photographs, who doesn’t end up cheating your money and giving you tacky captions in your wedding album like, “Love like flowing river, it don’t stop” <--- you know it doesn't sound that right. 6. the perfect place to spend your honeymoon, with enough shopping places for the wife-to-be to spend the last of the husband-to-be's savings. ;D 7. the perfect house for the couple to stay in, most definitely cannot stay with the in-laws for fear of the wife-to-be and husband-to-be's mum chopping each other up with the butcher's knife. 8. the perfect maid because your wife-to-be has told the husband-to-be that she will NOT lift a finger to do the housework. not even to cook dinner. 9. the diamond bracelet and necklace to match the perfect engagement ring, because you're supposed to show her how much you love her ;D 10. the perfect job to feed your wife-to-be's perfect taste in perfection. ;D Did I miss anything out?